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Sven: ‘Rooney Scares the Swedes’

   

I hope everyone reading this in Stockholm is sitting down.

Sven says that he is going to start Wayne Rooney because “opponents don’t want to hear that Rooney is starting.”

He then added that “Tottenham, Chelsea and Everton fans want to see Wayne Rooney playing. Even Manchester City fans want to see Wayne Rooney playing for England.”

I had no idea that you could find hashish so readily in Baden-Baden, but there you go!


  • Walnut

    Is it true that Rooney has the smallest penis in the world cup? – If so… thats scary!

  • mek

    Not yet, but once we win it he might well have!

    How do you know about the dimensions of his manhood anyway walnut?

  • Grimjim

    Hey Swedumb

    you haven’t seem him play have you? Trust me his porn star potential will be the least of your nations worries when we kick off tonight…

    Good luck.

  • ETucker

    I just hope Rooney doesn’t get injured and misses the knockout rounds.

    Of course, with Theo Walcott, Peter Crouch, and Michael Owen, Sven has lots of quality to turn to.

    Oh, wait, this is the most poorly constructed team in the history of England (poorly constructed, but still talented)

  • Ingerland??

    Has DreamWorks been informed that “Shrek” will play for England? They will sue your asses if they find out!

    Maybe a scary movie for the mature public in England, but in Sweden Shrek is rated from 7 years of age.

  • Rubber heed

    Sweden’s goal minder could not stop the slow motion replay, so good luck tonight boys.

  • Dido

    Rooney will scare the swedes with both his skills and his looks.

    ENGLAND!

  • Dalmasen

    Rooney was crying like a baby when he leaved the match – a very big sad crybaby. A little baby girl…

  • LJ

    I really don’t get it. We’re not that good at all. Never mind the fact that Crouch had to cheat, but he didn’t head the ball, the ball hit off his head! Same thing tonight, very few actual headers, just ugly head in the right place at the right time!

    Cole is good and he was the only one that played all that well tonight. We don’t have a team full of awesome players, we have a team that are more concerned with money and fashion than the fact that they are supposed to be supporting our country. I think Sven started Rooney because he was scared of Sweden (not that good a team, but with some fantastic players none the less) and I don’t really believe that anyone is scared of a guy who hasn’t played much for the last few months, especially one with a tendency to pile on the pounds.

    If Sweden are so crap how come they were very unfortunate to hit the bar twice (one of which they would have been awarded a penalty for if the ref. had seen what was happening in the box). As for the fouling, I assumed the ref wasn’t going to give any yellow cards after the stuff he let our players away with, then all of a sudden he gives two cards to Sweden for much lesser incidents. I want us to win because we deserve to win, not because we are quickly becoming one of the biggest cheats ever in a World Cup. Can we stop the bad tackles and diving (well, now that Owen’s out…) and actually prove ourselves to be good at football.

    If we want to lord a win over the rest of the World we have to win it fairly and because of talent, not by fluke or cheating. We’re lucky we’re meeting Ecuador and not Germany, there’s no way we would beat Germany at the moment.

    Our best chance in a long time and we seem to have guys that care enough to cheat, but not enough to give it everything they’ve got.

    If we can find 10 other Coles we’ll be fine, but Beckham, Rooney, Campbell…!!!!!!!

  • Words of Wisdom

    Lol @ GrimJim

  • Magic Genie

    Mmmm Swedes with a sense of humour, that’s a first!

  • Ingerland??

    Say Genie, what’s in that bottle?

  • ITALIA

    rooney is shit. beckam could possibly be the most overrated player in the world. ENGLAND SUX MAJOR DONG. they can barley beat TNT and this peice of shit team is expected to win it all…… give me a break.

    if england wins the world cup i’ll cut off my penis thats how positive i am.

  • magic genie

    ITALIA, start sharpening those scissors mate…Oooh that is gonna hurt!

  • magic genie

    Hey ITALIA, start sharpening those scissors.. Oooh that is gonna hurt..

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